June 11

I remember ordering this cake in 2013, those are crushed Birthday Cake Oreos on top.

I don't know why I don't have a picture of Adam from that year.

Today is Adam's 28th birthday. I know I am writing in present tense, but that's what feels right. I was wishing Ashleigh (Adam's roommate and friend of several years) a happy birthday this week, when I found out she, Tim and Adam have their birthdays 3 days apart. 3 roommates/friends born June 5, June 8 and June 11. So they had a birthday thing.

Ashleigh wrote me this incredible note, which makes today a little bit less hard:

It is hard with Adam being gone, and so much changing in life from day to day, but I don't remember Adam as troubled or unhappy. He was always smiling and always arguing (in a good way cause that's what he loves to do) but we still miss him desperately, and sometimes the smallest stuff reminds me of him and I break down and cry, but it's true that time heals all wounds. The deepest take longer, sometimes a whole lifetime in itself. But he's still just as loved and isn't left out of anything we do. He's still talked about and loved the same as if he was sitting here with us now. Adam's soul is as beautiful as his mind, and I know he's happy, and in return that makes us happy. I know this time is still extremely hard, especially with his birthday coming up, but he should still be celebrated all the same, no matter where his soul is traveling.

And so today is a day of remembrance, tears, and still struggling to make sense of what happened. I do know that I don't regret being Adam's mother, even with all the anguish and heartache his death has brought. I know now that Adam had the best of friends, who say and think things like Ashleigh did above. He was loved, and I can celebrate that. Thank you, Ashleigh Elizabeth!