Old Man Winter

 Here we are again. The lead up to the worst imaginable news, the biggest shock of my life. Learning that my son decided the pain of killing himself was less than the pain of living with his brain, getting help with whatever demons he was fighting, will always be my lowest point. I wish to god I could have helped him face what he was struggling with. To think he felt so alone is beyond what I signed up for. 

I'm surprisingly not that contemptful of winter this year. It hasn't been bad. Walked the cemetery loop yesterday morning relatively comfortably. 

I'm soon to be 60. That's both terrifying and pretty cool. I like the ages with a zero at the end. I don't know what this year will bring, but I'm pretty sure I have the resources to handle it, and the resilience to find the joy. Inspire, dare, persevere. 

Dreams on the Edge

 What is this about?

riding a motorcycle without a helmet, fast

swimming with alligators

running into the ocean with a surfboard

The first two had me nervous, the third was delightful until my alarm disturbed the surf. 

2023

 This year I was thinking about not doing resolutions. I completed about half of last year's though honestly some were not easily quantifiable. Like "show more of my insides on the outside." 

I've been thinking about how it's stupid to wish people a 'happy' new year. Or a healthy one. Or whatever we usually thoughtless say. Why? Because most of us know you can't predict or control many of the things that happen in our lives. What I can hope for, and wish for others and myself, is the following:

Inspiration- to keep being creative, making things and creating programs and even having creative thoughts. 

Courage- to do what I'm afraid of, to do what I think is right even when it's difficult. 

Strength- to face and overcome whatever storms come my way. To help others who are being tossed about on a rocky sea. 

That is going to be my mantra for 2023. I think that about covers how I would like 2023 to go. What is your plan?