Obsessed

I can't even.

Yes, I can. I discovered this book by accident. I don't follow Reese Witherspoon but somehow ran across her announcement that Untamed was her April book club choice. I then started seeing videos by Glennon Doyle called "Morning Meetings." There was something about her that made me order the book. I rarely buy books, but with the library closed...

I got it and devoured it. It's part memoir, part handbook, part love story, and a whole lotta feminist theory in an easy to digest way. Take for example the chapter on shampoo. Glennon notices the descriptions on the shampoo bottles in her kids' shower. The boys shampoo sounds like they are going to war. The girls shampoo is soft and diminutive.

Indeed, I looked in my shower at the bottle of Axe and found this:

The cleaner you get (picture of man showering)

The dirtier you get (picture of man and woman)

Unlimited female attention 

I kid you not. We are literally being conditioned (no pun intended) while we shower. She asks us to disrupt the taming of women by our action in the world. To summarize Ava DuVernay, forget about breaking the glass ceiling, make your own building. The last thing I would want to be is CEO of a corporation (although we need women there), so that gave me a new perspective. 

Glennon tells me I am a writer if I wonder if I am a writer day in and day out, if I envy writers. I won't say envy in that I want to be anyone else or live their life, but envy in the sense that successful writers have committed to allowing their words to flow out and are touching others. 

And she ends the book with my favorite meditation. 

I am

I am

I am

This is not a fill in the blank, but what has been described to me as the nearest we can get to God. 

Upsidedown and Sideways

One of the 'exciting' things I decided to do during quarantine is borrow a friends headstand contraption. There may be a fancier name for it but I don't know it.

When Cal was here I asked if he wanted to try it. He wanted a demonstration first. I easily flipped up into this position:

Cal promptly goes, "That's the most athletic thing I've ever seen you do, Mom."

It doesn't get any better than that.

Nephew

Adam was the first nephew on both sides of his family. No nieces either. Uncle Kevin mailed me a stash of photos that arrived today that are precious to me. Never seen them before, or my memory has failed me. It's like a new window into my boy.

Like finding his Instagram account, and the girl pictured in one of my favorite photos of him. Those comments, those stories, these new pictures, they sustain and help me so much. I hope I keep discovering these pieces of him until we meet again.

I stumbled on this blog today, and these two boys, Rob and Adam, could be brothers.

https://thesandandthewater.net/

Has anyone else packed on the COVID 20? Pounds, that is?

I'm also learning so many new things! Tik Tok, Houseparty, Instagram video chat, Zoom, teletherapy, copy and paste on the Iphone (I know, Boomer). The creative juices are oozing out of people. I'm impressed. It's unbelievable. How would this shut down look before the Internet?

What is the thing most people will remember about this period of history? TIGER KING. 

Joe Exotic + Carol Baskin = biggest thing to hit the small screen ever.

I just found this picture I love, love, love. Great memories with my favorite sister in Denver, CO 2018. Special thanks to Eli for giving us the excuse to visit Denver again and relive old memories, and find old friends.

Cup O' Joe Musings

Before I get sucked down the rabbit hole that is social media, my thoughts for this Friday morning. It's so great it's still Friday because I took yesterday off, and it's feeling wonderful to still have a three weekend ahead.

In many ways, my lifestyle is not that much different pre- and post-Corona. I thankfully still have a job to go to. But apparently, I already stay home a lot. I do visit my elderly mom a couple of times a week because I believe isolation kills more people than viruses.

Well, Friday blended into Saturday, but just barely. It's now 2:23 a.m. Can you believe sometimes coffee makes it easier to fall back asleep? For this I hope.

People are getting really creative post-Corona, and we are all just doing the best we can. Have you noticed how cheap gas is? To change it up a bit, we are driving to another town to walk the trails in a large park and maybe get some lemon ice cream afterwards. That's allowed, right?

I have a 500+ page book I am slogging through. Since the library is closed, this is a good thing, except it's not really that interesting. We all read Clan of the Cave Bear back in the day, and Jean Auel wrote a sequel in 2002, but it doesn't have the fascination I recall.

I like how mental health advocates are calling out the misnomer social distancing, which should be known as physical distancing. We are social creatures and this should not be discouraged albeit it looks different. It's physical distancing we need to avoid.

So just one more thing. I had my first virtual happy hour last night with Jacob Moore of NoStigmas and Kevin Hines who is just a beacon of light in the suicide prevention world. Kevin answered my question (fan geek moment) about people backing away in public and just getting such a stressed vibe out there. It does disturb me a little bit even though I am relatively secure. He said it's not personal (which I knew) but self-preservation, and I would add fear. I like that shift that people are just trying to survive and that is understandable. We are all on different levels with this thing. I will leave you with this visual I thought was very fitting:

My Truth

I've been counseling people on micro and macro grief related to the worldwide pandemic this week (thanks for the lead Betsy), and the situation is getting intense with Illinois' stay-at-home order extended to April 30th. I sat down to watch the Today show this morning (which I never do), and I just cried at the news of an ER doctor who died of COVID-19, thousands of people trapped on cruise ships that no one wants to dock, nurses worn out and lacking proper PPE, need I go on? I usually don't expose myself to much of this lest I go to the darker side, which is my way of coping, no judgment, so I can continue marching forward.

But with this growing alarm, I think of little positive ways to cope. For instance, I moved all my black clothes (1/3 of my wardrobe) to the back of the closet and will try to wear other colors this month.

Here's some things you might do during Corona April:

1. Get your 10,000 steps every day
2. Complete your Census
3. Organize your photos (digital or print)
4. Make hearts and hang them in windows and doors
5. Donate blood
6. Moisturize everything
7. Take a nap. Take another nap.
8. Clean your closets
9. Write letters
10. Make a craft
11. Do something for the elderly (juggle or play music outside their windows?)
12. Post something funny or creative on social media
13. Do a tutorial video either serious (yogis doing yoga) or sarcastic (me doing make-up)

I hope this note finds you safe, well, and grateful for what you do have. Somehow we will come through this and maybe find some new strength and connection.